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Literature
Punny (Sans x Reader)
“So, you mean to tell me that a group of monsters are ordering Spaghetti and ketchup in bottles… From KFC?”
The new kid nods.
“JUST TELL THEM WE DON’T HAVE ANY WITHOUT INSULTING THEIR KIND!”
“Um, sir those aren’t mutually exclusive.” I interject.
“Y/N IF YOU’RE SO CLEVER YOU DEAL WITH THEM. IF THEY’RE UNHAPPY IT’s YOUR FAULT!”
Great. Well off I go. Out of the frying pan and into the… fire.
Holy shit, a man is on fire.
“Hey, welcome to KFC, how can I help you?”
The taller skeleton turns to me, “I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS WOULD LIKE SOME SPAGHETTI!”
“Um, we don’t sell that here.”
The smaller skeleton dressed in a worn blue hoodie, black basketball shorts and pink fruzzy house slippers chuckled.
For a monster he’s pretty fly.
“BUT IT WAS ON A FLYER! LOOK!” As he said this he withdrew a piece of folded paper from a pocket in his shorts and t
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Literature
Alls Well That Ends Well (Pace x Reader)
The sun is in the sky, the wind in my hair and my bike was filled with fuel. Nothing could go wrong today-
“Morning, Y/N”
Never mind. Of course he could ruin it. It’s practically his job.
“It’s such a good day and I’ve just finished my patrol. Wanna head out and get some lasagna together? Two of my greatest loves together it will be great.”
I sigh, “Pace I hate pasta almost as much as I hate you. Now go away I’ve got a job that doesn’t require you interfering.”
“Great! I’ll come along. Then we can go eat! After all, you can’t say no, I’m your boss.”
Of course Pace plays that trick again.
I sigh once more, “Fine, whatever. But don’t mess up. I have to be stealthy so you can’t be your usual self. In fact, why can’t you be more like…?”
Who’s less annoying than Pace?
Dante is too brutish, Felicità is too reckless, Luca is an idiot, and Pace makes me
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Literature
Fear of Heights or Fear of Death? Part 4/Final
It's been weeks. Still she hasn't shown up. I can't even talk to Darlene about it all because she's part of FSociety. The world is a cruel place and this woman seems to be a glimmer of hope. She wants the same things I do without the methods of FSociety.
All I have to talk to is Qwerty and-
"Cute dog, Flipper right? Nice."
And there she is, the woman who I have been waiting to talk to all this time, in my apartment, with my dog in her arms...
Wait, what?
"Um, how did you-"
"Get in, easy. For a hacker and a wanted criminal you sure do leave a trail. Also, better invest in better locks for your window." She walks past me with Flipper in her arms to go look in the fridge, "Hey, do you happen to have... Aha! Got it." She pulls out a bottle of fizzy water and walks with Flipper to sit on my bed.
Okay. So the woman who I have been waiting for is now in my apartment on my bed and is laying down and closing her eyes...
"What are you doing?"
"I'm trying to sleep," she clutches Flipper closer to
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Literature
Valentine (Spock x Reader)
Spock didn’t understand the appeal of emotions. Anger caused failure, violence, death and grief. Sadness caused anger, loneliness and desperation. Emotions caused humans to lose control. They became awkward or stifling depending on the emotion. Spock had no need for emotion in his life.
Well, until he met you that is.
You were wild and adventurous. Illogical and driven by emotional. Fragile yet strong.  A living contradiction. The opposite of Spock.
Y/N L/N was fascinating to Spock and his obsession didn’t go unnoticed by his friends.
He visited McCoy whenever he knew she was on shift, if only to catch a glimpse of her. He avoided Jim to visit the cafeteria when he knew she would be eating with her friends. He had drifted from Nyota and that had caused their relationship to end. He was definitely obsessed no matter how much he tried to hide it.
It was love and logically unrequited since he had never spoken to her.
That would change today. February the fourteenth. Also
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Literature
Winchester's New Groove (SPNxReader) Chapter 1
I have been watching them for hours. Sleep that is.
Crowley owes me a get out of Hell free card for this as well as what he promised.
I mean, how hard can it be to kill the Winchester brothers?
I just had to sneak into Hell, steal a book that belonged to his mother that was written in a language that no one can find on Google translate and hopefully poison them both, keeping them out of the way for good. With death.
Well, you can tell by the way I use my-
“What is it now Crowley,” I hiss into the phone. “This had better be good.”
He groans and I can hear him swallow something. No taste whatsoever. Well, he is a demon. “Witch, don’t try my patience anymore or you will be tortured and-“
“Hung, drawn and quartered in Hell before returning for more torture. I know, you won’t stop saying it.”
He huffs.
“Well, come on. Why did you ring?”
“I rang because I’m sending someone to come help you, a la
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Literature
Fear of Heights or Fear of Death? 3
Hello friend. It's been a while. It's been exactly 12 hours and 14 minutes since my arrest and 16 hours, 32 minutes since my lost dosage of morphine. I've been through the usual after effects of not having morphine in my system and I've been down from my high for quite a while so I can't feel any effects. It's strange. Morphine is illegal and yet our society is fabricated on pills, powders and remedies that make people feel the way society wants the to. Where I am now,two cops are on anti-depressants and a detective takes Midol for her period so that she can continue to work despite it being a natural bodily function. Yet, if someone takes any other form of drug that the government can't make money off of by tax or-
The door opens and that woman comes back. Y/N if I remember correctly. She's clever and obviously not from here judging by the accent. She walks forward and sits down in the chair in front of me, the opposite side of the metal table whih blocks the view of the camera mounte
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Literature
My Angels Part 4 (Dean x Reader x Sam)
It’s been days since I’ve told them everything and they’ve moved me down into a dark room, strapped into a chair with a red pattern on the floor.
I should of been honest. I shouldn’t of lied. But I need to get help.
For her.
“Rise and shine, princess.” Dean’s deep voice echoes in the darkness beyond this room.
“Please don’t call me that.”
“Call you what? Princess? Would you prefer bitch who lied to us?”
I sigh, hanging my head.
Light enters the room through the doors sliding open as Dean enters, walking behind me and beginning to unchain my arms from the chair.
“What…”
“Don’t say anything. You said something about getting into Avalon right?”
“Yes, why? Do you wish to return to your duties?”
“My duties? Hell no. I’m gonna cut all ties to Oberon and you’re gonna help me.”
He couldn’t possibly mean…
“Yeah princess, that thing. Se
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Literature
Fear of Heights or Fear of Death? Part 2
The ride had ended and it was hell.
Aside from the overall fear of death, the awkwardness was eating me alive.
The cute guy next to me, who is possibly a stoner, is now covered in the contents of my stomach.
“I am really sorry about this. I’m not usually like this. Generally because I don’t go on roller coasters, or lifts or bridges…”
The guy starts walking off.
“Wait. I didn’t get your name.” I jog to catch up to him as he swiftly meanders through the crowd.
“It doesn’t matter.”
“What do you mean it doesn’t matter? I need to know your name so I can… apologise for…” I point at his hoodie, “…that…”
He sighs and walks out of the entrance to the park, stopping just outside and taking what looks like a cigarette from his pocket.
“Is that a joint? Or is that a cigarette? Or is that, you know…”
He turns to me, putting the cigarette to his lips and lighting
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Literature
Fear of Heights or Fear of Death? (Part 1)
Holy shit.
Holy shit.
Why am I here?
Oh yeah, (Y/F/N) is gonna pay off all my rent if I can do this.
Which I can…
Not.
I can’t ride a rollercoaster.
BEEP
“The ride is about to start, please keep your hands and feet in the moving vehicle at all times.”
BEEP
The guy sat next to me sighs, burrowing himself deeper into his hoodie.
My hands tightly grip the bar in front, becoming paler by the second.
I can’t breathe it’s too hot.
Oh God.
Goosebumps litter my skin
“Hi, excuse me.”
The guy next to me turns his head left, facing me. Holy shit, he’s gorgeous.
BEEP
“The ride will now start in 10… 9 … 8 …”
Oh he’s staring. What do I do? What do I say? Think, Y/N, think.
“7… 6… 5… 4…”
He sighs, slouching in his seat. I look at him again, he has off coloured skin, kind of blue actually, almost as if…
“Do you take drugs?”
“3… 2″
He t
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Literature
My Angels 3 (Dean x reader x Sam)
"So... How do we get you back home?" Dean said as he carried three brown glass bottles that were opened into the room which I now know is the war room.
"Well, there's few ways that only some have access to. To get to Avalon, a person must either be summoned or from Avalon originally. Unless you wish to use the portals which are the easiest way into Ava- Wait, no. No. No. No. We can't do that. It's too risky. And it's not like I can just waltz right in accused of such a heinous crime. Especially if I'm with you and your brother."
Dean walked forwards, placing the bottles onto the table before sitting directly in front of me. "Y/N, if it gets you home, wouldn't it be easier? Here, have a drink whilst I go get Sammy. If we're making plans, we need him."
"Why?"
"Because all of the stuff you're about to tell us? I won't remember after this whole thing blows over. Now drink up." As he said this, he stood up from the table, whisking a bottle off of the table.
"What exactly is this?"
"Beer.
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Literature
Awakening (Chapter 1)
“What do you mean? Our new home. I don’t know you at all. And I would be most grateful if you let go of me.”
He smirked, a hand leaving my waist to run through his hair.
“Well, this will be fun. Let me tell you how we’re so,” he moves his face close to mine, a breath away before whispering, “close.”
He leans back and walks out of the door into a long corridor, I follow after shortly, closing the cell door behind me. He begins to walk forwards, whilst I continue to follow him. We walk in silence, passing more cells decorated with the same metallic red liquid streaked down each door engraved with roman numerals and other symbols that I vaguely recognise but cannot interpret.
How curious.
We approached the end of the hallway, reaching a spiral staircase. The stairs were cogs jammed unevenly into the wall with no banister to attach them together.
Alex sat upon the last step, patting the space on his right. “Sit down, I will tell you how
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Literature
Words Have Power (Jareth!Dean x Reader) Prolouge
It’s a cold Saturday night, the wind is howling against the windows, screeching like a cat being strangled. My parents out of town but I’ve got to babysit to keep out of trouble so I’m looking after Sam Winchester for Mary and John that live in the house on the corner.
At the moment I’m talking to my friend (Y/F/N) about our plans for this evening being ruined. She’s not happy.
“What do you mean you’re not coming? The one night the Red Hot Chilli Peppers are playing in OUR TOWN and you decide to babysit? How stupid are you?”
I sigh, “I didn’t choose and Sam really isn’t that bad-“
WAAAAAH!
“Ugh, BRB.”
Stupid kid, with his stupid whining, with his stupid bed time and stupid parent’s rules.
A big two bedroom house on the corner of a road that sticks out like Lady Gaga in a church with white-washed walls and a white picket fence. The Winchesters moved in a year ago with a year old baby Sam, no one kn
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Literature
My Angels 2 (Dean x Reader x Sam)
“Okay, so you’re a fairy.” Said Dean
“I’m a fae actually.”
“Okay, so you’re a fae and you’re. . .”
“Running away because I have been accused of a crime I didn’t commit. Killing the late Lady Gilda.”
Sam, he refuses to be called Sammy by anyone but Dean who is his brother apparently, sighs and stands up from his seat across from me before standing up and walking out of the room, his ‘plaid’ shirt’s ends fluttering behind him.
Dean grabs his beer bottle and takes a swig before placing it onto the table in front of him. It smells vile. “Okay, sweetheart so you’re running from the law so what? Where did you think you were going to go?”
I didn’t. I didn’t even think. I just need to get- “Out. Out of Avalon.”
He laughs bitterly, a hand curling around his right knee, the other dangling by his side as he slouches further in the chair. “Ah, Avalon. I am
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Literature
Hustling (Sam X Chubby!Reader)
(Sam's POV)
"Dean, I'm pretty sure it's a vamp nest so all we need to do is locate them-"
"And gank 'em, I know Sammy. Come on. Relax. Drink your beer, pick up a chick... Drink more beer. Now I am going to talk to that one by the bar." He drains the rest of his beer, hopping off his bar stool and carries the empty beer bottle to the bar where the tall, long-legged, skinny brunette is stood swaying slightly to the rhythm of the song in the background with her two friends, both very similar to the first.
She's pretty but not shockingly beautiful.
I push a hand through my hair forcing it flat against my head, taking a long drink of my beer whilst gazing around the room.
It's a small bar with a small crowd for a Friday night.
By the single, wooden door decorated with various posters and notices are two girls - red-headed, short, skinny and wearing black cocktail dresses.
To the right by the bar are the three girls and Dean.
The girls by the bar are definitely Dean's type. Skinny. Brunette.
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Literature
Awakening (Genderbent!Alice x Fem!Reader) Prolouge
It’s cold in here, awaiting my fate in the dimly lit cell I’ve been put in, where I’m currently sat in the middle of the small room. The cell walls are made of red splattered clay with cogs and whirring brass parts turning, writhing and spilling out more of the same red liquid spread on the walls. It smells horrible in here. Like death.
I don’t know why I’m here, I just remember being at the Doctor’s. Doctor Bumby.
He seemed like a good man but… now I’m not so sure.
The medicine. . .
It makes me feel sick; worse.
And the hypnotherapy. . .
I can’t remember what I do in that time but I feel wrong afterwards, I feel lost and confused.
The door opens, a young man appearing in the doorway of my cell, illuminated in the soft light of a nearby candles outside the cell. He has short, raven black hair framing his face with pale skin and vibrant green eyes. He’s tall and slim, a dark figure in a midnight blue vest, pristine white shirt
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Literature
My Angels (Dean x Reader x Sam) Chapter 1
My head is throbbing. I haven’t opened my eyes yet and I already know I’m safe.
Well, safer.
Hopefully.
Probably. . .
Not.
It’s dark in here. I can’t see anything but I’m hearing voices.
“…They can’t stay here, we picked them up off the side of the road.”
“Dean, what else are we gonna do? Take them back to that road, leaving them in the middle of a crime scene?”
“Uh, yeah, Sammy they’re not our problem, they seem normal enough. They’re probably just a bit…” the deep voice that was labelled as ‘Dean’  states.
The ‘Sammy’ lets out a sigh, “Dean, they were on the road. In the middle of the night. In the middles of a crime scene. That we’re investigating because of the amount of fairy sightings. Yeah, Dean, totally logical.”
The voices are getting louder now, heavy footsteps echoing in a steady beat.
“Sammy, just because of all that. . .
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Favourites

Literature
2P!Canada x Child!Reader - Hunting Poachers
"Remember, if they're not doing as you say, then you call out my name, okay?" Matthieu said.
"Okay~!" you smiled.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
You walked through the forest, holding your baseball bat. You a small pink backpack that Oliver gave you before you left. You lost Matthieu while walking around but you didn't worry because you have your bat though you were walking around for an hour now.
As you walk, you found a man with a shotgun. You immediately ran to him.
"Sir! Your not suppose to hunt here!" you told him.
"I do whatever I want kid!" the man grumbled.
"Matt! This one is not going!" you shouted.
"What the ****?"
You swung your bat and hit him on his guts, "Don't you swear! Swearing is bad!"
The man fell on his knees and holds his stomach, "**** you!"
After listening to what he said, you hit his head, making him lose consciousness.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Later that afternoon, Ma
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Literature
2P!America x Child!Reader x 2P!Canada - Swear Jar
You have always seen your father scolding your brothers whenever they swear. As a result, they have to put money in a jar that your father calls it a 'Swear Jar'. As far as you know, Allen and Matthieu have been swearing more when Oliver isn't around so you decided to carry your own swear jar whenever you're with them. To make it a little more interesting is that you get to follow them around the whole day.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Today, Allen and Matthieu decided to take you along with them to get the money they own in an abandoned building.
When you three arrived, there was a man waiting. He seems scared and was shivering.
"So you got our money?" Allen smiled as he let his bat rest on his shoulder.
"P-Please! G-Give me o-o-one more w-week!" The man begged.
"WE ALREADY ****ING GAVE!" Allen yelled.
"Swear jar!" you told him as you pulled out your jar.
"What?! Ugh! Fine!" Allen put his hand in his pocket then threw a couple
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Literature
2P!Canada X Child!Reader - Go the F*ck to Sleep
  

                                   2P!CANADA X CHILD!READER  
                                         GO THE F*CK TO SLEEP
[A/N : There is cussing! What do expect from a 2P? It's also clear there will be cussing because of the title. This is based on a book called, 'Go the F*ck to Sleep', by Adams Mansbach.
_________________________________________________________________________________________________
        It was a normal night for the 2Ps.
Well, a Sunday movie night, and the Allies were getting ready to watch movies.
Oliver was placing popcorn in the microwa
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Ball :icongrobelski:Grobelski 424 22
Literature
2p!England x Diabetic!Reader
“Today’s the day, I’m gonna do it! I’m going to give (y/n) a cupcake!” Oliver grinned
“You always give (y/n) cupcakes and she turns them down. What makes today any different?” Al asked
“This cupcake was baked with my deepest affections” Oliver smiled
“Your so lucky you have us to keep you from getting your baking butt bullied” Matt grunted
“You two love me because I’m your darling big brother” Oliver chirped
“I think mom dropped you on your head as a baby” Al snorted
“There she is. Go get her romeo” Matt shoved Oliver in the direction of (y/n) as she opened her locker.
Al and Matt watched as he offered her the little cake. She frowned then shook her head. Then Oliver slumped and frowned. (y/n) softly smiled at Oliver before walking away.
“What happened?” Al asked with his arms folded
“She didn’t want it….” Oliver sighed
“That’s it,
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Literature
2p!England x Sick!Reader: A Spoonful Of Sugar
~A Spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down
The medicine go down-
The medicine go down
Just a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down
In a most delightful way~
“Come now, Poppet! Drink your medicine!” Oliver pleaded with a frown as you refused to open your mouth for him.
“Get that syrup crap away from me!” you shook your head.
“I’ll give you a spoonful of sugar afterwards to help get the taste out” Oliver offered as you rolled your eyes and opened your mouth while swallowing the disgusting fluid. Oliver handed you a spoonful of powdery white sugar and you gulped it down.
“Now rest Poppet, while I try to clean up this mess that was once a bedroom” Oliver peered around your messy bedroom. Clothes, trash, paper, wrappers, and books were scattered everywhere.
~A robin feathering his nest
Has very little time to rest
While gathering his bits of twine and twig
Though quite intent in his pursuit
He has a merry tune to toot
He know
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Literature
Drunk!Clingy!2P!England X Dandere! Reader
I apologize for the  language (even if I have censored it), bad spelling, and excessive use of commas and the word 'f@#k' (it's a bad habit). I hope I got the characters right as this is my first 2P fanfic. Comments, criticism and favouriting is appreciated! But seriously....PLEASE DON'T HATE!!!
Also, this kinda long...Just a warning....
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
You were walking over to your friends' Al and Mat's house for a sleepover from your job at the restaurant at about 11pm. You, unlike most people, were not concerned about pedos/rapists/kidnappers/thugs ext, ext, this was mainly due to the fact that your older brother Kuro had trained you in all forms of martial arts, kendo, and insisted that you always carried at least 15 kunai and 20 shuriken with you. Your only weakness was your personal space issues. You were probably at an international level in fighting, yet a simple hug could throw you off guard. Whoever hugged you usually ended up beaten with a few broken bones. N
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WalkingMelonsAAA's Fabulous Mettaton Ex!!! :iconyamsgarden:YAMsgarden 1,904 103 The Power of Mettaton Neo - Undertale :iconwalkingmelonsaaa:WalkingMelonsAAA 6,488 298 Made for Entertainment - Mettaton and Frisk :iconwalkingmelonsaaa:WalkingMelonsAAA 9,874 638 Mettaton :icontheminttu:TheMinttu 1,688 44
Literature
[FR] Rivaille x Reader - Le pianiste
•••
Vous vous préparez pour aller à votre cours de danse. Vous prenez vos affaires et courez jusqu'à la maison de Rivaille.
Cela faisait trois jours qu'il s'enfermait dans son studio et jouait sans cesse le même morceau de l'Art de la Fugue de Bach.
Vous sonnez chez lui, aucune réponse comme d'habitude, vous décidez d'entrer, la porte étant toujours ouverte.
À vos pieds, vous voyez des partitions, éparpillées sur le sol, traçant un chemin vers sa chambre, éclairée avec sa lampe de chevet.
Vous ramassez ses feuilles et vous dirigez vers lui.
Il somnole sur son piano, les yeux mi-clos, tenant un recueil de partitions.
Les Études de Chopin.
Vous lui prenez et commencez à feuilleter les pages.
Des milliers d'annotations envahissent les lignes, concernant le rythme...Rivaille a toujours eu du mal à être en rythme, et c'est pour cela qu'il avait toujours un métronome pendant ses entra&
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Literature
Just one bite? Vampire!Levi x reader (Chp 1)
Warning the pov changes a bunch aha haha I am not good at writing pov correctly so just play along with it!
I hope ya'll enjoy part one! 1372 words!
(Update:i edited it with grammarly to help fix my grammar)
____________________________________
The cold air and snow blow's past me as I walk down the dimly lit street. I shudder pulling on my jacket sleeve's so they cover my hands.
Looking down the long alley's as I passed by them I come across a sight that horrified me. Standing there was a woman pinned to a wall by a short man.
He is clearly hurting her but, I just stand there staring in horror at the event's unfolding in front of me. Slowly I back away from them trying to be quiet so he doesn't hear me.
But just knowing my luck I kick an empty can that was sitting on the curb. He turns quickly dropping the woman now focusing on me.
I gasp loudly and turn running as fast as I can down the street trying to get away from the man. I make it to my apartment building dashing inside slamming
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Aloy - Horizon Zero Dawn - 2 :iconloish:loish 6,038 111 Yo Girl, Keep It Together :icongayrantea:Gayrantea 42 11 CANDY STORE Genderbend AU :iconprince-zer0:Prince-Zer0 24 0

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DeathToThePool
Laura
Artist | Hobbyist | Literature
United Kingdom
Hi, I write fanfiction and I will do requests eventually, if anyone actually asks.
Interests
Hi, so I was tagged by absolutelymonstrous.deviantart… for my first ever tag so read on!

The Rules
1. Go to this: www.random.org/lists/
2. Pick 15 characters from any Fandom you're into
3. Tag five or more people
4. Have fun

1. Mom/Dad: Kyoya Ootori
This takes daddy to a different level but i guess he really is mommy now
2. Your sibling: Phichit
I'm not Thai but I can deal with being adopted to the insta babe
3. Your Grandma/Grandpa: Izaya Orihara
Ok... I have no words
4. Haunts you: Sam Winchester
Wow, he finally died... This is because of my terrible fanfiction, isn't it?
5. Your boyfriend/girlfriend: Yuri Plietsky
6. Your ex: Kaoru
7. Your best friend: Tamaki Suoh
YAAS Queen! We SHALL SLAY
8. Proposed to you: Ciel Phantomhive
What about Elizabitch?
9. Your boss: Germany
I'm dead
10. The random person you met at the bar: Elliot Alderson
So he decided to leave the house for once
11. Your Rival: Hermione Granger
Well shit, i'm fucked
12. Gave you your first kiss: Draco Malfoy
Oh thank god
13. Drunk and singing karaoke with: Dean Winchester
He can barely sing as a demon, why lord why?
14. Played 7 minutes in heaven with: Kyoya Ootori
2You can pay me back with your body" RIP ME
15. Gave you your favorite dessert: Shuu Tskyama
Nope. Nope. Nope. He's fit but no. I am not a cannibal! Or am I?

Ok, so now that I've had my fun, I tag: cappie-tan.deviantart.com/, tonystarks-girl.deviantart.com…, lovvurgirl.deviantart.com/, razor-eyes.deviantart.com/ and finally keatonkeenan.deviantart.com/

Have fun

Activity


“So, you mean to tell me that a group of monsters are ordering Spaghetti and ketchup in bottles… From KFC?”

The new kid nods.

“JUST TELL THEM WE DON’T HAVE ANY WITHOUT INSULTING THEIR KIND!”

“Um, sir those aren’t mutually exclusive.” I interject.

“Y/N IF YOU’RE SO CLEVER YOU DEAL WITH THEM. IF THEY’RE UNHAPPY IT’s YOUR FAULT!”

Great. Well off I go. Out of the frying pan and into the… fire.

Holy shit, a man is on fire.

“Hey, welcome to KFC, how can I help you?”

The taller skeleton turns to me, “I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS WOULD LIKE SOME SPAGHETTI!”

“Um, we don’t sell that here.”

The smaller skeleton dressed in a worn blue hoodie, black basketball shorts and pink fruzzy house slippers chuckled.

For a monster he’s pretty fly.

“BUT IT WAS ON A FLYER! LOOK!” As he said this he withdrew a piece of folded paper from a pocket in his shorts and thrust it at me. Slowly, I unfolded it and read the numerous spelling mistakes, the scribbling of a purple crayon decorating the border-

“Sir, this is a fake flyer. That means that there’s no spaghetti. It’s an impasta.”

Silence filled the room with the last word of my sentence as Papyrus started to shake, his fists clenching whilst the other skeleton’s grin grew.

The man on fire simply sighed soundlessly and sat down at a booth with two other monsters and a robot.

The only sound that could be heard was the slight whistle of air coming from the skeleton’s…ears until, “SANS YOU IDIOT, HOW COULD YOU DO THIS!”

The smaller skeleton began to chuckle as Papyrus ranted.

“Um, not to be rude but do you want to order or what? Because this is like eating a clock, it’s extremely time-consuming.”

Uh-oh.

--------------------

After Papyrus called down the others (Alphys, Mettaton, Grillby and Undyne) introduced themselves and ordered. The smaller skeleton stayed back, dozing in the booth.

Once they had all finished they all filed out, leaving the booth a wreck with a slowly awakening skeleton stretched over the seats.

I walked over and poked the skeleton, “Hey I know you’re awake I can see right through you.”

He smirked before rolling back to face away from me.

Fine, if puns will get you to move then so be it because I need this goddamn job to pay off things.

“You are a major lazy bones, huh? Your brother must think you’re bone idle. Your love of puns means you probably play the trombone, your favourite art piece is a skullture and you don’t like horror movies because you don’t have the guts. Man, I’m so good at this I could be Sherlock Bones.”

With that he sat up grinning before turning to me and saying, “I’m Sans by the way. You’re pretty punny but you forgot a couple.”

“Englighten me then.”

“I like to eat off of bone china, I go out to pick up somebody, I can’t go to church and play music because I don’t have any organs and other than ketchup I order spare ribs.”

I can’t help it so I laugh, “You probably get into your house using skeleton keys.”

“I can’t play sports because my heart isn’t in it.”

“Guess I’ve tickled your funny bone.”

“I knew we would get along.”

“Oh yeah how?”

“I could feel it… In my bones.”

---------------------------

And after that we spent more time making puns. Then exchanged phone numbers.

It all started because of a cheesy impasta which I was extremely grate-ful for.
Punny (Sans x Reader)
Happens whilst you work at KFC. For my friend Natalie.
Loading...

The sun is in the sky, the wind in my hair and my bike was filled with fuel. Nothing could go wrong today-



“Morning, Y/N”



Never mind. Of course he could ruin it. It’s practically his job.



“It’s such a good day and I’ve just finished my patrol. Wanna head out and get some lasagna together? Two of my greatest loves together it will be great.”



I sigh, “Pace I hate pasta almost as much as I hate you. Now go away I’ve got a job that doesn’t require you interfering.”



“Great! I’ll come along. Then we can go eat! After all, you can’t say no, I’m your boss.”



Of course Pace plays that trick again.



I sigh once more, “Fine, whatever. But don’t mess up. I have to be stealthy so you can’t be your usual self. In fact, why can’t you be more like…?”



Who’s less annoying than Pace?



Dante is too brutish, Felicità is too reckless, Luca is an idiot, and Pace makes me miserable…



“BE MORE LIKE NOVA!”



He gawps at me, his golden eyes going wide at the mention of Nova’s name.



“Great! No objections? Okay, let’s go.” Grabbing him by the ear I drag him past my bike towards the docks.



Now I have to walk all the way to the docks dragging this buffoon.



Fantastic.

“Well that went awfully.”



The mission was a failure so that was an understatement. I had almost found them so I attempted to use the 19th card’s powers, Sole: The Sun, to shine a little light on the situation. However, as I was searching for it Pace knocked into me which made me lose my concentration and as such I set the entire dock ablaze.



“Papa is going to murder me,” I sigh, “Oh well. Never mind. Pace?”



He looks at me and I gaze up into his face, “Papa is sure to murder me so when I am gone promise me something.”



He tilts his head slightly to the left and sorrowfully gazes into my eyes, “Anything, Y/N, even though you’re not going to die. I won’t let you!”



“Look after my bike for me.”



He looks away from me, stroking a hand through his hair before looking back at me, huffing and walking away.



Wait, what?



“Come on! You promised to get Lasagna with me after the mission. That should give Papa enough time to cool down especially if Felicità gets to him first before Nova. So you'll be fine!"



"Well..."



"Don't be hesitant, you promised! Now come on!" he grabs my hand and begins to run.

"So, what would you like to order?" The waiter stands at our table with a notepad and



"I would like-"



"TWO PLATES OF LASAGNA!"



"Wait, no I would like-"



"THREE PLATES OF LASAGNA!"



"No, I don't even like past-"



"FOUR PLATES OF LASAGNA!"



"PACE NO!"



"FIVE PLATES OF LASAGNA!"



The waiter sighs and walks away.




 There's a lot of sighing going on today.



"Pace, you cannot eat five plates of lasagna and I don't like pasta."



"I'll eat for both of us then!"



He looks so happy but, "I'm not needed here then. Goodbye Pace. Thank you for trying to help me today.



"Wait, don't go!"



"Why not? You get your lasagna and I'll cover for you. I'll take full responsibility if that's what you're worried about."



"No, the truth is... I like you."




 Why is he confessing?"



"I know."



"And the truth is it's not just because you're really pretty but you're also super smart and you're kind. Thoughtful but rude. You're super cool. Yet you don't like lasagna what's up with that but anyway I just- Wait you know?!"



I nod.



"And you haven't said anything? Oh God I'm such an idiot now you'll never want to work for me again and now you'll probably switch to Nova and avoid me completely. Oh God, you might fall in love with Nova! No, wait is it because I'm annoying because I CAN CH-"



I grab his tie and drag him across the table capturing his lips in a kiss before releasing him and sitting back down. "Shut up you idiot."



"YOU LOVE ME TOO! YES! MY PRAYERS HAVE BEEN ANSWERED AND OH THERE'S LASAGNA. THIS IS OFFICIALLY THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE!"



Oh well, alls well that ends well I guess.

It's been weeks. Still she hasn't shown up. I can't even talk to Darlene about it all because she's part of FSociety. The world is a cruel place and this woman seems to be a glimmer of hope. She wants the same things I do without the methods of FSociety.

All I have to talk to is Qwerty and-

"Cute dog, Flipper right? Nice."

And there she is, the woman who I have been waiting to talk to all this time, in my apartment, with my dog in her arms...

Wait, what?

"Um, how did you-"

"Get in, easy. For a hacker and a wanted criminal you sure do leave a trail. Also, better invest in better locks for your window." She walks past me with Flipper in her arms to go look in the fridge, "Hey, do you happen to have... Aha! Got it." She pulls out a bottle of fizzy water and walks with Flipper to sit on my bed.

Okay. So the woman who I have been waiting for is now in my apartment on my bed and is laying down and closing her eyes...

"What are you doing?"

"I'm trying to sleep," she clutches Flipper closer to her chest as she says this. "I've been working overtime to make up for your escape. So yeah, I'm sleeping."

No. No. No. Nobody sleeps in my bed. No one. Not even the women who come here for sex and drugs. No one sleeps in my bed.

Time ticks by and I realise I'm just staring at her awkwardly as she snuggles with my dog on my bed. She sits up and it's then I realise that she's wearing only a t-shirt. My t-shirt.

"So, that was a nice five minute nap. Now onto business. You clearly want something out of me, what is it?"

"Wait, you came and found me-"

"Semantics."

"And are now blaming me for all this?!"

She shrugs and scratches Flipper's head before reaching over to grab the fizzy water and drink some.

She stops drinking long enough to say, "Look, Elliot, you're cute. I like you and I get the feeling you like me too. So tell you what, you have enough information to find me. I'll see you when you can and then we can go on a date." With that she places Flipper on the bed, stands up and walks over to me. She places a hand on my chest before tilting her head (up/down) and captures my lips in a slow, gentle kiss.

She's like morphine, a slow burning sensation that electrifies my veins and numbs my senses expect for one, taste. All I can taste is her and the water.

After a few seconds she lets go and walks away, walking out of the door.

I touch a hand to my lips.

I have to find her for more of that.
Spock didn’t understand the appeal of emotions. Anger caused failure, violence, death and grief. Sadness caused anger, loneliness and desperation. Emotions caused humans to lose control. They became awkward or stifling depending on the emotion. Spock had no need for emotion in his life.

Well, until he met you that is.

You were wild and adventurous. Illogical and driven by emotional. Fragile yet strong.  A living contradiction. The opposite of Spock.

Y/N L/N was fascinating to Spock and his obsession didn’t go unnoticed by his friends.
He visited McCoy whenever he knew she was on shift, if only to catch a glimpse of her. He avoided Jim to visit the cafeteria when he knew she would be eating with her friends. He had drifted from Nyota and that had caused their relationship to end. He was definitely obsessed no matter how much he tried to hide it.

It was love and logically unrequited since he had never spoken to her.

That would change today. February the fourteenth. Also known on Earth as Valentine’s Day; the day of love.

Today Spock would talk to Y/N.

If everyone would leave him alone for more than a minute.

This morning, Spock had gone to see Y/N at her shift but was interrupted by McCoy who had asked him his opinion on the chocolates that someone had given McCoy ‘anonymously’ even though the box had a note from the Captain just like the box that every one of the rest of Spock’s friends except Spock himself had received. By the time McCoy had finished talking to him, Y/N’s morning shift had finished.

After the incident with McCoy, Spock had reported to the bridge. Ten minutes later, Y/N ad reported to the captain to give him the reports from McCoy before bidding farewell and carrying a file away from him. As she stepped off of the bridge, something slipped out of the folder. Y/N didn’t notice. It would have been Spock’s chance had Nyota spotted it and offered to take it to her next destination where Y/N would be, with Scotty, until lunch.

At lunch, Spock hastily head to the engineer’s office to find that Y/N had just left, according to Scotty. Before Spock could leave, Scotty asked him about the folder that had been sent to him earlier that day. So Spock reluctantly helped him until the end of lunch.

After lunch, Spock reported back to the bridge and requested to leave. Before the captain could answer, Sulu asked if he leave early to wish his husband and family a happy valentine’s day. The captain agreed and as such, Chekov was called to take his place. That meant Spock had to stay on the bridge to watch over Chekov.

Finally, the day was over and Spock had just left the bridge when he Y?N ran into him. Literally.

“Oh my god! Are you okay? Oh no you’re not, I’ve just hit you! IS THAT A BRUISE?” Y/N screeched.

“I am fine. How are you?” Spock couldn’t believe he was staying so calm with Y/N so close to him.

Fascinating.

Y/N blinked before getting up and brushing themselves off, then reaching a hand down to aid him up from the floor.

“I’m good, I mean I’m alone on Valentine’s Day, you know day of love and all that but that’s fine. So…” they stopped, running a hand over their scalp.

“I am alone as well. Why is someone so aesthetically pleasing alone?”

They blinked before biting their lip, “I haven’t found anyone I like yet. The guys around here are to similar to how they are at home; loud, boisterous and driven by their second head if you know what I mean.”

He did.

“I am alone as well so would you care to accompany me to the cafeteria to acquire some sustenance before heading back to my room to play some chess?”

They nodded, “Lead the way.”

They started walking to the cafeteria Spock had only just left before they spoke up again, “By the way, I’m Y/N L/N.”

He already knew.

“I’m Spock.”

And together they walked off to the cafeteria, the beginnings of a romance blossoming.
Hi, so I was tagged by absolutelymonstrous.deviantart… for my first ever tag so read on!

The Rules
1. Go to this: www.random.org/lists/
2. Pick 15 characters from any Fandom you're into
3. Tag five or more people
4. Have fun

1. Mom/Dad: Kyoya Ootori
This takes daddy to a different level but i guess he really is mommy now
2. Your sibling: Phichit
I'm not Thai but I can deal with being adopted to the insta babe
3. Your Grandma/Grandpa: Izaya Orihara
Ok... I have no words
4. Haunts you: Sam Winchester
Wow, he finally died... This is because of my terrible fanfiction, isn't it?
5. Your boyfriend/girlfriend: Yuri Plietsky
6. Your ex: Kaoru
7. Your best friend: Tamaki Suoh
YAAS Queen! We SHALL SLAY
8. Proposed to you: Ciel Phantomhive
What about Elizabitch?
9. Your boss: Germany
I'm dead
10. The random person you met at the bar: Elliot Alderson
So he decided to leave the house for once
11. Your Rival: Hermione Granger
Well shit, i'm fucked
12. Gave you your first kiss: Draco Malfoy
Oh thank god
13. Drunk and singing karaoke with: Dean Winchester
He can barely sing as a demon, why lord why?
14. Played 7 minutes in heaven with: Kyoya Ootori
2You can pay me back with your body" RIP ME
15. Gave you your favorite dessert: Shuu Tskyama
Nope. Nope. Nope. He's fit but no. I am not a cannibal! Or am I?

Ok, so now that I've had my fun, I tag: cappie-tan.deviantart.com/, tonystarks-girl.deviantart.com…, lovvurgirl.deviantart.com/, razor-eyes.deviantart.com/ and finally keatonkeenan.deviantart.com/

Have fun

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:iconwindmeister8:
WindMeister8 Featured By Owner Jan 11, 2017
thank you for the fav~ :glomp:

please do check out my other LevixReader oneshots and series as well as LelouchxReader series (Scifi, Action) if you're interested! XD
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evangeline16williams Featured By Owner Edited Dec 8, 2016  Hobbyist General Artist
Thank you for the favorites!
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:iconnotapeasant:
NotAPeasant Featured By Owner Nov 14, 2016  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you for the faves!  I really appreciate it! :D
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SeraphenaParks Featured By Owner Nov 8, 2016  Student General Artist
Thankee for the fav~!
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sindysugar Featured By Owner Sep 13, 2016
Thank you for the favs! :iconletmehugyouplz:
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KittenQueen24 Featured By Owner Sep 9, 2016  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you for the favs!! :huggle:
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abvore Featured By Owner Jul 31, 2016  Hobbyist Writer
Thanks for the faves~
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:iconthehulkisinthetardis:
Thank you so, so, SO much for all of the faves and the watch! I love your username haha.
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:iconwords-of-fate:
Words-Of-Fate Featured By Owner Jul 28, 2016  Student Writer
Thank you so much for the watch and for the fav on Behind the Act (Tamaki Suoh x Tsundere!Reader)! :heart:
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:iconrandmwriter:
RandmWriter Featured By Owner Jul 25, 2016  Student Writer
THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THE WATCH MY FRIEND! Deadpool icon 
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